


Palapaths

by DwarvenBeardSpores



Category: Rusty Quill Gaming (Podcast)
Genre: Conversations, Episode 182 - The Garden of Yerlik, Friendship, Gen, Ghosts, Grief/Mourning, Love, Paladins, Religion, The Heart of Aphrodite | Azu Fan Week (Rusty Quill Gaming)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-15 20:35:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29441985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DwarvenBeardSpores/pseuds/DwarvenBeardSpores
Summary: There's a weight on her shoulders, a scent of, well, whatever it is Grizzop smelled like.For The Heart of Aphrodite Azu Fan Week, day 7: Dedication and Loyalty
Relationships: Azu & Grizzop drik Acht Amsterdam, Azu (Rusty Quill Gaming) & Everyone
Comments: 15
Kudos: 26
Collections: The Heart of Aphrodite





	Palapaths

**Author's Note:**

> *scoots in at the end of Azu Week* HELLO I LOVE THE PALAPALS
> 
> This is for Day 7: “I love thee to the depth and breadth and height my soul can reach.” Elizabeth Barret Browning  
> Obsession - Dedication - Loyalty
> 
> And I am not the first to have written this scene, but can there ever be enough Azu and Grizzop content? No.

There's a weight on her shoulders, a scent of, well, whatever it is Grizzop smelled like. Harrison Campbell likes describing scents, but Azu's never been very good at identifying them herself. Do arrows have a smell? He seems strangely peaceful, though she can feel silent thumps of his heels against her breastplate, like he's urging her to go faster. 

He doesn't say anything. Azu never was very good at reading him, but she doesn't think it's an unhappy silence. When Grizzop was unhappy, he was always very loud. Around her, Azu's friends murmur at guests of their own, though no one except Wilde seems to be hearing their companion's voices. 

She turns her focus to Grizzop, pays attention the same way she does when she's praying.

"You probably expect this, but I miss you," she murmurs, soft, private, though the others seem wrapped up in their own experiences. "I wish we could have talked more. I think… I think we learned a lot from each other, and there is much more we could have learned. About being paladins. And people." They hadn't always agreed, of course, quite the opposite. She thinks Grizzop agrees with this, though. Maybe he's missed her too.

"I got to be small," Azu says. "I didn't really like it. But Hamid let me sit on my own shoulders, just like you are. It was... interesting." She feels phantom fingers against her scalp. Such tiny fingers, that match where she had rested Meerk's claws only a few days ago. She wishes she'd gotten the chance to let Meerk ride her shoulders, too, before the crash.

She closes her eyes, still walking.

"You talked about protecting the pack," she says softly. "I've been thinking about that. How do Artemis paladins choose a pack? Because I think we might have been using different words for the same thing." She wishes he could answer, explain how he saw it. Zolf has a crew, and Cel has buddies, and Hamid has family, and Kiko has people she trusts, and Sasha had mates. "I think it all comes back around to love, really."

"You would do anything to keep your pack safe. You  _ did  _ anything to keep Sasha safe. I--" She swallows. Opens her eyes to make sure she is still following the group. She is. They're all still occupied. Hamid hums softly, cheeks damp.

"These are the people I love," she murmurs. "And I will do anything to keep them safe. I'm sorry I couldn't do enough for you and Sasha. I loved both of you too."

For the first time, the presence on her shoulders exudes a familiar impatience. Like she shouldn't be sorry, or like he's forgiven her already and is waiting for her to catch up and forgive herself. She laughs. "I'll try," she promises. 

Then. "Oh! Grizzop! I need to tell you. I'm in the Northern wastes, and I was very sad after our airship crashed, and Aphrodite appeared for me. There was an actual… presence? I could feel her, and hear her. Not even  _ Erin Fairhands  _ has experienced something like that." Is that Grizzop's excited bobbing, or hers? "I don't know if Artemis appears for her followers, but I hope you had something similar. It was... it was beyond words."

Grizzop still doesn't answer. "I can't hear you," she explains. "But if there's anything you want to tell me, I can listen, for a while." 

She walks in silence, and the weight shifts on her shoulders, a chin rests on the top of her head. She gets the feeling, perhaps, that Grizzop  _ has _ seen a god. That he is proud of himself. That he is proud of her too. And although that is perhaps more than Azu has earned, she does not doubt him.

"The world is not in a good state, Grizzop," she says. "I think I understand better why you were always so angry, and impatient. I want things to be better. But I will not stop loving in the meantime. And it feels, Grizzop, it feels like perhaps you have some time now to be gentle."

She thinks she catches some type of emotion-- pleased and indignant at once?-- before the wind changes and the comfort of his presence disappears from her shoulders. From the disoriented exclamations around her, everyone's companions had left at the same time. Her hand meets Hamid's and they hold each other tight.

"It was good to talk to you," she whispers to the forest. She can almost hear Grizzop's cackle on the breeze.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I'd love to know what you thought. 
> 
> You can also find me on tumblr as dwarven-beard-spores, and twitter as @beardspores.


End file.
